CRINGE: Gladstone's grossest bond clean horror stories
A sea of nappies
WALKING out of a job is not ideal, even at the best of times.
It garners you a bad reputation and goes against any hard worker's grain.
But that was the choice Wicked Cleaning was forced to make when staff arrived at a residence to find a scene directly out of your favourite horror movie.
"We walked into the property and, I kid you not, we could not see the floor of any room of the house," Miss West said.
"I've dealt with cockroach faeces all over homes and human poo on bedroom and toilet walls.
"I didn't let used tampons and pads jammed down toilets get in my way, but walking into a house covered in used baby's nappies was another level.
"Literally you could not see the floor of any room on the house."
Resembling the never-ending ocean in more ways than one, the sea of nappies extended well beyond what the naked eye could see.
To the workers' horror, the space under the oven was packed to the brim with poo-filled nappies as well.
"You know how you use a broom to sweep stuff into a corner?
"Well picture that, but instead of dust, picture sh*t.
"And instead of a corner, picture a space chockers with sh*t-filled nappies."
Miss West said the home's once smoothly painted bathroom was found blanketed in a black fur coat of mould, though minor in comparison to the filth in the rest of the home.
"I texted the people and said sorry but this is a bit above my hygiene level," she laughed.
"I didn't want to be rude so I just told them we didn't have the equipment to cope with that."
"I have to draw the line somewhere ... for my own health."
A honey pot of poo
OWNER of Gijima Cleaning Services, Amelia Zwicker's four years in Gladstone have been anything but uneventful.
"You definitely see some interesting things," the South African turned Gladstone local said.
"I once found sh*t in a pot, which was probably my worst experience.
"The property manager was pregnant at the time, and she threw up. I just about puked myself, too, when we opened that cupboard and found it."
The business owners have also come face to face with used condoms stuck to windows and a homemade sex toy strategically hidden above the fridge.
"My husband stuck his hand on top of the fridge and wrapped his hand around it.
"He thought it was a torch and as he picked it up he dropped it, thinking 'oh my gosh!' It was a dildo!" she laughed.
"It was really strange.
"It was made out of broomstick and then had plastic melted over it to make it look like a dildo."
Toilet training gone wrong
GREEN wheelie bins crawling with maggots in the middle of the kitchen was the first thing a Gladstone cleaner noticed was amiss when tasked with cleaning a particular house.
And no, it wasn't the worst part of the residence - because in what world would a designated outdoor rubbish bin, found in the kitchen and infested with baby flies, be the worst part of the story?
Instead, Miss West was unfortunate enough to find one room in the house specifically used as a toilet.
"They had clearly just stopped using the bathroom and had gotten in the habit of peeing and pooing in the room at the back of the house," she said.
Miss West said she'd been on cleaning jobs where the fact the regular, civilised human toilet wasn't being used wasn't even attempted to be kept a secret.
"Bedrooms and living rooms even had their 'special' corners," she said.